Great points here! My work name tag has shifted from editor to tech worker to solar energy communicator. But I’m trying to think of myself more as a writer now, as that’s my focus even as I have to keep working for a few more years. But there are also other labels —like neighbor, daughter, friend — that have become more important recently. And definitely “older woman.” That one seems important. In true Rosana fashion, I resist having just one label. 😀
That's one thing I realized after I stepped out of my corporate life — that we have more than one bullet point in that name tag. Like you, those other bullet points have become more important to me! Cheers, Rosana! 🤗
I like the name tags metaphor. The whole idea of letting go of identity. Or as we get older, we move into our second phase of identification, psychologically.
I can give a personal example. For 30+ years I was all about musical theatre. Massive hobby. I've seen over 300 stage productions, most of them on Broadway. I've been inside 35 of the 42 theatres on Broadway. The fact that I know that. The fact that I spell it "re." lol
My office used to be plastered with Broadway memorabilia.
It was part of my identity.
To quote someone clever, it's no longer the headline (I love that).
And you probably wouldn't even know any of this about me if you knew me now.
Love that example, Leo, thanks so much for sharing! But now, I'm desperately intrigued and dying to know the context and the whole story behind your backstory! For a moment, though, you reminded me of my dentist in NY. His clinic was filled with Broadway posters (none of the usual teeth + gum pictures!), and the music that filtered through the speakers was always Broadway songs. He used to tell me, "dentistry is what I do for work, this (and he points to the posters) is my life". You aren't by any chance my previous dentist, right? 😂
Name tags, labels, how-we-identify-our-selves is definitely something I've given a lot of thought to, and not just because social media requires that we come up with one! But it is interesting to read how folks introduce themselves. I REALLY don't like defining myself through work, but I understand why we do it.
Have you decided what you want to be when your grow up, Lou? 😉
Funnily enough, I'm not surprised you said that, Lani - from what I know about your from your writing! I'm curious how you introduce yourself if/when you say something other than just your name. Do you say teacher or writer or neither? These days, my head/heart says writer/student of philosophy is who I want to be... but honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if 5 years from now, that changes too! Cheers, Lani ☕️
I was fired from my Waldorf teaching position when I was in my 30s, and it was shocking, horrible, and devastating. I learned a great deal about the world, and how much I identified with the role. Since then, I can say I’m a teacher, but I don’t take it too seriously, it’s not like sewn into my heart. But as one of my mentors told me in a thoughtful letter, “you have the heart of a teacher” ~ I’ll take that, xo
This is so interesting to think about. As I ponder retiring from paid work in a few years, this identity shift gives me pause. Trying to think up new name tags for myself!
I love the bullet point idea. I can definitely relate to Nora, as I wore the widow nametag also. And yes, in time I decided I didn't want that nametag anymore. I have come to prefer no nametag other than a kind person. 😊
Fantastic! Yes, labels help neaten an otherwise messy life.
I’ve had many- wife, mom, stay at home mom, single-mom, working mom, career pivotor, small business owner, early retiree, whew! Your post has inspired me to examine my current label and perhaps rewrite it. Thank you!
I do this for a living. I help executives to Shift their Stories. As for me, I am still a work in progress, but I did just throw outa decade of personal and client notebooks/sketches. The great purge was a cleansing of sorts. Now to do the closet…
I love the invitation to see labels as temporary, as having a place and a purpose for a time, and the wisdom in knowing when to let them fade. I love the line - "It's just not going to be the first thing on my name tag." - which reassures that we don't have to turn our back on that part of ourselves that has been so prominent, we just don't have to lead with it anymore. Thank you, @Lou.
I think it's a way of embracing ourselves - who we've been and who we are becoming. Not needing to turn our backs - even on the parts of ourselves that we've moved away from. So glad to hear from you. Cheers, Susan! ☕️
Lou, you mentioned the "Well then, who am I now?" question at 2 AM. And honestly, that’s where I live sometimes, in that space of nocturnal existential crises. I've been pondering this: what if these "name tags" aren't just for other people? What if they're primarily for ourselves? A way to quiet the internal chaos, to give our own brains something to hold onto when we feel like we're floating? What if we think we need to have a label for others, but really it's because we need a label to tell ourselves who we are? I wonder if we’re so concerned with telling everyone who we are, that we forget to have the internal conversations with ourselves.
Thank you so much for voicing this out, Alex. I know there has been much maligning of "labels" and many have rejected the idea of having a label. I don't feel the same way and think very much like you. My labels have helped me navigate life. Especially the ones that have come because I chose them or caused them. They have indeed quieted the internal chaos, as you've said. Cheers, Alex! ☕️
Lou, thank you for handling the subject of our ever-evolving "name tags" with such care. I am a fan of the writer Beth Kempton, whose gentle reminder that "Any identity is a construct of the ego -- just as self-doubt is..." has helped me to move from fighting certain labels such as "retired" to acceptance (although three years on, I still sometimes have the need to mention that I was an international humanitarian aid worker...see I did it again...)
Thanks for mentioning Beth Kempton, Kaarin. I'm not familiar with her work but will check her out now. I really like that reminder of hers that you mentioned. It's funny, for a while after I left my corporate career, I used to say "former xxx"... and even now I know of folks from that life who introduce themselves as "retired partner". I used to raise my eyebrows when I hear those labels, but now I get it... they're not ready to rearrange the bullet points just yet. Cheers, Kaarin! 🫖
Oh and I've totally had a name tag for many moons, Lou - Single Parent. That is what defined me for so long. It gave me strength. It gave me a reason to tag my stress to. It also gave me a reason to be proud as my sons grew and launched themselves.
My new tag - as of 3 weeks ago - is Grandma. I like this tag a lot.
I enjoyed this post, Lou, and not just because you gave me such a kind shout out at the end! This moving through identities never seems to end, does it? May we one day be able to drop them off and meet each moment as it is!
Been there (and still there from time to time) done that (but not any more).
I liked labeling because I felt the need to give others a name to call me. I am done with labeling because now I can be anyone I want and I don’t give a rats ass if others know how to and what to label me. 😆 Liberating!
Lou, I love this! You’ve captured so clearly how identity has shifted over time. Beautifully put.
Here’s where my thoughts wandered as I read…
I thought of the Pre-Boomer/Silent Generation—wearing name tags like job titles (those engraved plastic pins my parents wore with pride)—static and compartmentalized.
Then came my own era of felt-tip “Hello, my name is…” stickers—where we could declare whoever we wanted the world to think we were.
These days, name tags have all but disappeared in my circles. Did Gen X decide they’d rather not be compressed into a label—or have random strangers know their name?
Now, identity feels more like a playlist—always updating, always curated for context. Name, gender, or any other descriptor? Optional. Who they are is meant to be evident. And like a mood ring or digital display, identity shifts to reflect where they are and where they choose to belong.
You’ve captured exactly where we are in this cultural progression—and you got me thinking:
How am I morphing as I declare who I am today?
Please don’t make me wear an engraved name badge. Morphing feels so much better than any of the previous versions—at least for me.
Ah, Mo - thank you for adding this layer to the conversation. Made me realize one thing: when I'm with my older (boomer) sister, she likes to introduce people with a metaphorical "name tag". But when I'm around younger folks, the name tagging seems not to be a priority. I didn't notice this until I read your note. So interesting. But the playlist context lands well for me. It echoes the rearranging of bullet points that I mentioned in the essay. Cheers, Mo!
Great points here! My work name tag has shifted from editor to tech worker to solar energy communicator. But I’m trying to think of myself more as a writer now, as that’s my focus even as I have to keep working for a few more years. But there are also other labels —like neighbor, daughter, friend — that have become more important recently. And definitely “older woman.” That one seems important. In true Rosana fashion, I resist having just one label. 😀
That's one thing I realized after I stepped out of my corporate life — that we have more than one bullet point in that name tag. Like you, those other bullet points have become more important to me! Cheers, Rosana! 🤗
I like the name tags metaphor. The whole idea of letting go of identity. Or as we get older, we move into our second phase of identification, psychologically.
I can give a personal example. For 30+ years I was all about musical theatre. Massive hobby. I've seen over 300 stage productions, most of them on Broadway. I've been inside 35 of the 42 theatres on Broadway. The fact that I know that. The fact that I spell it "re." lol
My office used to be plastered with Broadway memorabilia.
It was part of my identity.
To quote someone clever, it's no longer the headline (I love that).
And you probably wouldn't even know any of this about me if you knew me now.
Shedding name tags right and left. 😊
Love that example, Leo, thanks so much for sharing! But now, I'm desperately intrigued and dying to know the context and the whole story behind your backstory! For a moment, though, you reminded me of my dentist in NY. His clinic was filled with Broadway posters (none of the usual teeth + gum pictures!), and the music that filtered through the speakers was always Broadway songs. He used to tell me, "dentistry is what I do for work, this (and he points to the posters) is my life". You aren't by any chance my previous dentist, right? 😂
Hahaha heavens no!
Name tags, labels, how-we-identify-our-selves is definitely something I've given a lot of thought to, and not just because social media requires that we come up with one! But it is interesting to read how folks introduce themselves. I REALLY don't like defining myself through work, but I understand why we do it.
Have you decided what you want to be when your grow up, Lou? 😉
Funnily enough, I'm not surprised you said that, Lani - from what I know about your from your writing! I'm curious how you introduce yourself if/when you say something other than just your name. Do you say teacher or writer or neither? These days, my head/heart says writer/student of philosophy is who I want to be... but honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if 5 years from now, that changes too! Cheers, Lani ☕️
I was fired from my Waldorf teaching position when I was in my 30s, and it was shocking, horrible, and devastating. I learned a great deal about the world, and how much I identified with the role. Since then, I can say I’m a teacher, but I don’t take it too seriously, it’s not like sewn into my heart. But as one of my mentors told me in a thoughtful letter, “you have the heart of a teacher” ~ I’ll take that, xo
This is so interesting to think about. As I ponder retiring from paid work in a few years, this identity shift gives me pause. Trying to think up new name tags for myself!
The discovery is half the fun (and confusion 😉). Cheers Mary!
I love the bullet point idea. I can definitely relate to Nora, as I wore the widow nametag also. And yes, in time I decided I didn't want that nametag anymore. I have come to prefer no nametag other than a kind person. 😊
You've achieved full liberation, Nancy 👏🏼 👏🏼 👏🏼
Fantastic! Yes, labels help neaten an otherwise messy life.
I’ve had many- wife, mom, stay at home mom, single-mom, working mom, career pivotor, small business owner, early retiree, whew! Your post has inspired me to examine my current label and perhaps rewrite it. Thank you!
Hi Anne Marie. Yes to rearranging (rewriting) our labels! So nice to hear from you. Cheers.
I do this for a living. I help executives to Shift their Stories. As for me, I am still a work in progress, but I did just throw outa decade of personal and client notebooks/sketches. The great purge was a cleansing of sorts. Now to do the closet…
Hi Tobin. Nice to have you here. Yes, a great purge can be so satisfying! Cheers ☕️
I love the invitation to see labels as temporary, as having a place and a purpose for a time, and the wisdom in knowing when to let them fade. I love the line - "It's just not going to be the first thing on my name tag." - which reassures that we don't have to turn our back on that part of ourselves that has been so prominent, we just don't have to lead with it anymore. Thank you, @Lou.
I think it's a way of embracing ourselves - who we've been and who we are becoming. Not needing to turn our backs - even on the parts of ourselves that we've moved away from. So glad to hear from you. Cheers, Susan! ☕️
Lou, you mentioned the "Well then, who am I now?" question at 2 AM. And honestly, that’s where I live sometimes, in that space of nocturnal existential crises. I've been pondering this: what if these "name tags" aren't just for other people? What if they're primarily for ourselves? A way to quiet the internal chaos, to give our own brains something to hold onto when we feel like we're floating? What if we think we need to have a label for others, but really it's because we need a label to tell ourselves who we are? I wonder if we’re so concerned with telling everyone who we are, that we forget to have the internal conversations with ourselves.
Thank you so much for voicing this out, Alex. I know there has been much maligning of "labels" and many have rejected the idea of having a label. I don't feel the same way and think very much like you. My labels have helped me navigate life. Especially the ones that have come because I chose them or caused them. They have indeed quieted the internal chaos, as you've said. Cheers, Alex! ☕️
Lou, thank you for handling the subject of our ever-evolving "name tags" with such care. I am a fan of the writer Beth Kempton, whose gentle reminder that "Any identity is a construct of the ego -- just as self-doubt is..." has helped me to move from fighting certain labels such as "retired" to acceptance (although three years on, I still sometimes have the need to mention that I was an international humanitarian aid worker...see I did it again...)
Thanks for mentioning Beth Kempton, Kaarin. I'm not familiar with her work but will check her out now. I really like that reminder of hers that you mentioned. It's funny, for a while after I left my corporate career, I used to say "former xxx"... and even now I know of folks from that life who introduce themselves as "retired partner". I used to raise my eyebrows when I hear those labels, but now I get it... they're not ready to rearrange the bullet points just yet. Cheers, Kaarin! 🫖
Great read, Lou! Thank you!
Oh and I've totally had a name tag for many moons, Lou - Single Parent. That is what defined me for so long. It gave me strength. It gave me a reason to tag my stress to. It also gave me a reason to be proud as my sons grew and launched themselves.
My new tag - as of 3 weeks ago - is Grandma. I like this tag a lot.
Along with Life & Leadership Coach!
What wonderful news, Paula! Congratulations on becoming a grandmother. Boy or girl?
Baby girl! Thanks for asking.
I enjoyed this post, Lou, and not just because you gave me such a kind shout out at the end! This moving through identities never seems to end, does it? May we one day be able to drop them off and meet each moment as it is!
I have a sneaking suspicion that we (and by that I mean, "I") will be moving through identities until the very end. 😊 Cheers, Ceci!
Been there (and still there from time to time) done that (but not any more).
I liked labeling because I felt the need to give others a name to call me. I am done with labeling because now I can be anyone I want and I don’t give a rats ass if others know how to and what to label me. 😆 Liberating!
Yi! You are the model former-corporate and now-knows-exactly-what-shes-doing person! I aspire to your level of zen 😇. Cheers!
Lou, I love this! You’ve captured so clearly how identity has shifted over time. Beautifully put.
Here’s where my thoughts wandered as I read…
I thought of the Pre-Boomer/Silent Generation—wearing name tags like job titles (those engraved plastic pins my parents wore with pride)—static and compartmentalized.
Then came my own era of felt-tip “Hello, my name is…” stickers—where we could declare whoever we wanted the world to think we were.
These days, name tags have all but disappeared in my circles. Did Gen X decide they’d rather not be compressed into a label—or have random strangers know their name?
Now, identity feels more like a playlist—always updating, always curated for context. Name, gender, or any other descriptor? Optional. Who they are is meant to be evident. And like a mood ring or digital display, identity shifts to reflect where they are and where they choose to belong.
You’ve captured exactly where we are in this cultural progression—and you got me thinking:
How am I morphing as I declare who I am today?
Please don’t make me wear an engraved name badge. Morphing feels so much better than any of the previous versions—at least for me.
Thanks for getting my thoughts going today!
Ah, Mo - thank you for adding this layer to the conversation. Made me realize one thing: when I'm with my older (boomer) sister, she likes to introduce people with a metaphorical "name tag". But when I'm around younger folks, the name tagging seems not to be a priority. I didn't notice this until I read your note. So interesting. But the playlist context lands well for me. It echoes the rearranging of bullet points that I mentioned in the essay. Cheers, Mo!