Eschewing Shortcuts

No. 108: "We'll get there fast, and then we'll take it slow."

My dear reader friend,

There was a scene in the first Matrix movie that I used to wish was real. Picture Neo sitting in an old dental office chair, all hooked up and getting a fresh upload of skills from Tank.

“I’m going to learn Jiu-Jitsu?” he asks incredulously. When Morpheus checks in on him some hours later, Neo declares, “I know Kung Fu.”

I remember thinking that’s the way to learn. Where do I go for that? Hook me up, Tank.

Made this with DALL-E

I wanted the knowledge without the hours it would take to learn. To get to the end result without the long, frustrating journey. If that were available for the taking, why not? Or so I thought.

“I feel the need. The need for speed.” — Maverick

I was all about the shortcut — the easiest, fastest way to “there” because there were so many “theres” I wanted to get to.

These days, it’s called a hack. (One of several definitions of the word, anyway.) To hack something is to find a clever way to beat the system. And so, if learning Jiu-Jitsu took x number of months, a hack would be to learn it in much less time than that. A way to cut the line or skip it altogether.

• • •

​James Altucher is the best-selling author of Choose Yourself, a book I enjoyed reading once upon a time. I remember liking his quirky style, so I thought I’d go ahead and pick up his latest book, Skip the Line.

Except I couldn’t get past the first few pages this time. I found the book a salute to shortcuts. To not having to wait your turn or paying your dues, and to hacking your way to success.¹

“We’ll get there fast. And then we’ll take it slow.”

When do we opt for the decidedly long route? When do we take a leisurely walk instead of speed walking to the top of the hill? When is the long journey the preferred choice over the quick arrival?

• • •

I was chatting with a friend a few days ago, remembering how we used to rush home on Thursday nights to catch Friends on NBC. We’d watch the show live and then spend the next days chatting about Ross and Rachel, always. About the secret Monica and Chandler were keeping, and the day Phoebe finally found out. How we couldn’t wait to see what happened after Rachel went to pick Ross up from his China trip. We thought how amazing it was that we shared so many laughs out of a single 30-minute episode stretched over six days. In the days of Netflix, Prime, and on-demand streaming, all that is gone. Is instant gratification better?

• • •

There are more sands in the bottom chamber of my hourglass. This I know for sure. And while my initial instinct was to rush and do more, these days, the strong pull is to slow down. To meander and savor. To choose the few and get deep.

It also means, I realize, no fast-forwarding past the bad spots. Taking it all in — the good and the bad. Which, I imagine, is the main argument for shortcuts and skipping the line. If we could skip all the bad, why wouldn’t we?

But isn’t there something to be said about success being sweeter due in part to the pain we had to go through to get there?

If getting dropped by a helicopter to the top of Mt. Everest were possible, no doubt more people would prefer that. But I imagine the experience would never compare to the one they’d have if they were to summit through the Hillary Step.

Bottom Line

More and more, I find myself going after the quality of experiences instead of quantity. Perhaps this is due to maturation, learning lessons, and being somewhat wiser as a result. Perhaps I’m finally listening to the natural rhythms of my life instead of keeping up with the world’s pace.

I haven’t yet found all the answers. But I’ve learned to be patient about finding these things.

🏷 A Fulfilling Life

💭 muse

“Is a sloth really lazy or do they just move more slowly and deliberately? Some things have to go fast, but not everything does.” — Celeste Headlee, journalist, speaker, author.

🎙 what’s playing

I was recently joined by grief coach Charlene Lam for a wide-ranging conversation about "processing" our grief after the death of a loved one. We talked about the common feelings that show up during the grieving process, like guilt and regret. We discussed "moving on," what that even means, and the spectrum of care. Charlene also shared her unique approach to dealing with the belongings of our loved ones and how to reclaim the narrative and the stories we would like to remember and tell about them.

🍹 reader shout-out

A huge shout-out to WAGO reader, Yvonne Marchese, age agitator, author, and founder of The Age Agitators Club. This community brings together women committed to busting through their Midlife Funk to inspire, support, share our stories, and reimagine what’s possible as we grow older. Learn more about The Age Agitators Club.

💬 last word

I ended up taking an unplanned timeout of sorts. The nature of it being impromptu carried an element of guilty pleasure. A constant refrain in my head was, “I should be doing something productive.” Which got me thinking about what exactly is productive these days. That’s for another time, though. 😊

How has your summer began?

Here’s to an easeful week ahead.

Cool Beans,
Lou Blaser

1. Perhaps that wasn’t his intent, but that’s how I read it.