I get what you're saying, I really do. But in my experience women stay in uncomfortable situations that are not right for them for far too long. Society disregards women's pain and discomfort - normalizes it - and often lays out a path for us in which we endlessly sacrifice for others. My biggest lesson in life was to stop when I don't like it. Just stop. I don't need find more discipline, reframe or see the bigger picture. I need to prioritize my own safety and comfort as a woman in a world that often thinks I'm there to facilitate others.
Thank you for this. Yes, and absolutely. What you’re saying is so important, and I’m glad you brought it into the conversation. I don’t believe curiosity should be used as a cover for enduring what we shouldn’t have to. There is a point when the most self-honoring choice is to walk away, full stop. That point is deeply personal, and no one else gets to define it for us.
My piece was more about those moments when I catch myself shutting down too early, writing something off before I’ve given it a proper look. But it’s not a prescription. It’s more of an internal nudge/reminder for me when I sense I’m defaulting to judgment rather than discernment.
That said, I couldn’t agree more: we shouldn’t have to contort ourselves to fit where we don’t belong. Cheers, SkyDancer.
Thanks for replying and the nuance of what you said. I am a deeply traumatized survivor of abuse yet I've travelled to over 30 different countries and have lived a life which, to put it conservatively, has been full. So getting older has brought me the wisdom of finding the thin line between indulging my adventurer side and stepping into comfort and ease. Disengaging from that which is 'not for me' is, I have found, a skill.
I get what you're saying, I really do. But in my experience women stay in uncomfortable situations that are not right for them for far too long. Society disregards women's pain and discomfort - normalizes it - and often lays out a path for us in which we endlessly sacrifice for others. My biggest lesson in life was to stop when I don't like it. Just stop. I don't need find more discipline, reframe or see the bigger picture. I need to prioritize my own safety and comfort as a woman in a world that often thinks I'm there to facilitate others.
Thank you for this. Yes, and absolutely. What you’re saying is so important, and I’m glad you brought it into the conversation. I don’t believe curiosity should be used as a cover for enduring what we shouldn’t have to. There is a point when the most self-honoring choice is to walk away, full stop. That point is deeply personal, and no one else gets to define it for us.
My piece was more about those moments when I catch myself shutting down too early, writing something off before I’ve given it a proper look. But it’s not a prescription. It’s more of an internal nudge/reminder for me when I sense I’m defaulting to judgment rather than discernment.
That said, I couldn’t agree more: we shouldn’t have to contort ourselves to fit where we don’t belong. Cheers, SkyDancer.
Thanks for replying and the nuance of what you said. I am a deeply traumatized survivor of abuse yet I've travelled to over 30 different countries and have lived a life which, to put it conservatively, has been full. So getting older has brought me the wisdom of finding the thin line between indulging my adventurer side and stepping into comfort and ease. Disengaging from that which is 'not for me' is, I have found, a skill.
My mantra in these situations is 'be more Knope!'
It's always worth the effort! That's perfect. Expectations and narrative are the seeds of discomfort, for sure.
And I try to remember that it's never too late to reframe!
Great post. 💕
Cheers, Leo! Reframing is a good practice too.